Thanks guys. Yes, we looked through steam lists, but as MrChocodemon said, I wanted personal opinions/suggestions not an objective list, which is entirely un-helpful (mr. nails).
Yea, it doesn't have to fit all criteria, I think i'll take a look at some of your suggestions. We also found Hammerwatch and after playing that for a little bit it seems like a good alternative.
I'll have to give Risk of Rain another shot, I did enjoy it but I don't think I played it enough to form an opinion.
Thanks so much for your help MrChocodemon!